Brady writes
a completely one-sided essay on the inner thoughts of a man told by a woman. “I
want a wife who will take care of my physical needs. I want a wife who will
keep my house clean. A wife who will pick up after my children, a wife who will
pick up after me” (Brady, 4:1-3). Those things do sound quite tempting; I
myself wouldn’t mind someone to take care of my needs. Brady humorously
exaggerates the wants and desires that a husband dreams up of his wife. In
today’s age these things are done, but not “just” by the wife. Life’s a
two-person fight; teamwork gets us through.
As a wife, with 25
years of experience, who was raised in the old school tradition, a traditional,
family-oriented type of marriage is what I am living now. The saying. “what is
mine, is yours and what is yours, is mine” or “for better or worse, ‘til death
do we part” is the golden rule in my marriage.
My opinion about marriage is simple: The moment you say “I do” automatically means that what is
“mine” now becomes “ours.” Marriage is a mutual understanding between two
people, sealed with a vow of monogamy, equality, and love. As there are many
who are living in two-income homes, husband and wife must work together to help
each other prosper, especially with the house chores.
Brady seeks a
wife who is completely invested in all things to support the husband. She
states, “I want a wife who will work and send me to school. And while I am
going to school, I want a wife to take care of my children” (Brady, 3:3-4).
Where the ideal marriage is two-part, Brady’s ideal wife takes the
responsibilities of both roles, allowing the spouse to seek other uses of his
time. I was angered by this and thought, “This is ridiculous” because this is
not the way I understand a marriage to be. What I know is: I cook dinner, you
set the table, and then you clean dishes, and I put them away. I wash the
clothes you fold, I gave birth to the children and we clean them up after they
get messy. I read them a story and you tuck them into bed. And, when it comes
to finances, it should be both supporting each other. I buy you things and you
buy me things. We work together and support each other every day. That is what
I understand.
In paragraph 2 of the essay, Brady speaks of her
friend, who ultimately presented the topic. Her friend, recently divorced,
essentially suggested that he wanted, not just “another” (Brady, 2:3) wife, but
one better than the last. I think he did not want a wife; he wanted a personal
slave .The author tells a ridiculous tale of a man’s outlook. In the
description of the role of a wife, in his dream, she includes, “a wife who
makes love passionately and eagerly when I feel like it, a wife who makes sure
that I am satisfied” (Brady, 7:2-3). Being a housewife herself, she exaggerates
the position of an extremely self-centered personality, of what a stereotypical
male ego thinks a perfect wife should be. Personally, this sickens me. Although
it is in good humor that she makes these remarks, I find them offensive and demeaning,
and just plain rude. In your dreams, guys.
Judy Brady tries to express her personal understanding
about a hidden feeling of anger and betrayal. It is based on how she sees the
role of a man in her life. The essay is geared to encourage women, wives, exes,
and girlfriends to question where they stand.
The one-sided topics of this essay are blown out of proportion, but some
days they seem realistic. I can picture it in someone’s life, as she’s going
through a low point in a relationship. Brady includes this idea with, “I want a
wife who will not bother me with rambling complaints about a wife's duties”
(Brady, 5:1-2). At a low point in a woman’s life, bad isn’t bad, even when it
becomes worse. By this I mean, even when our life is low, if someone were to
take advantage of our submissive nature, at that moment, the ideal wife
(according to Brady) wouldn’t complain.
Brady exhausts the ideas of the “perfect” wife in
this essay. “My God, who wouldn't want a wife?” (Brady, 10:1). Honestly, I can
agree with that. Who wouldn’t I want someone to take up all the difficult
responsibilities that we have in life? To be able to go about my own business
knowing that, no matter what, anything I didn’t want to do, I wouldn’t have to
because a wife would handle it. Yes, that’s a great idea—a sick, dated,
chauvinistic idea. That’s something I can only accept as satire, a joke. Judy
Brady makes us think how, even though it sounds like it would be great to have
a wife like that, being that wife could never be an option. Her entire essay
holds perfectly the tone and reaction that this chauvinistic idea deserves, and
that is one of satire.
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